Fingerbanging/ bombing or whatever you want to call it, how to finger a girl has been an enigma to many people.
And that’s not to account that fingering is difficult, it’s just that sometimes it may not be at the top of everyone’s list or not a lot of people know exactly how to pleasure their partner.
It’s not always about the length or girth but the subtle intimacy of your hand in sexual pleasure. There’s always room to grow in the bedroom as it should always be a learning experience.
Bust out the candles, and the get-lucky playlist and let the magic flow with these tips on how to pleasure your partner with your fingertips.
Clean Up
We get that you’re a hard worker and those hands have been hard at work but no one wants dirty digits on their phone let alone your partner’s genitals.
Hygiene is always the best-fingering technique to start with. It doesn’t end there. However, if you’re against getting manicures, just know that all it takes is a good clipper and a buff to make sure your nails don’t dig into her.
And ladies, this goes for you as well, we know that this service is all about you! But it doesn’t hurt to make sure it’s in tip-top shape down there for the ultimate mind-blowing fingering experience.
Vulva Anatomy 101
You don’t have to memorize those big terms like labia majora and all that. Fortunately for you, fingering doesn’t involve a pop quiz. When it comes to anatomy, it’s important to know the lead – Hi, meet the “clitoris.”
With an astounding 8,000 nerves, you can only guess how sensitive this area is when it comes to indirect clitoral stimulation. Not only that but partnered with your partner’s vulva it could be the most intense experience your partner’s body could ever have!
The vagina itself and all its parts are quite sensitive and all you have to do is to pay attention to these parts and make sure that each crevice is taken care of with your partner’s pleasure in mind.
Ask Your Partner What They Like
Unwanted fingers inside your pants are a big no-no in all books! Before you want to go to town on your partner, it’s important to establish their consent and if they wish to perform this sexual encounter with you or not.
A clear yes gives you the sure sign of pleasuring them. It’s important to be an open ear on what your partner might like, whether it be the number of fingers, the direction, the speed, and all else that they prefer.
Listen to your partner as they know how to pleasure themselves best and apply what you’ve gathered.
Start Slow
Starting rapid may sound extremely sexy. It’s a marathon after all not a brisk sprint for the main event- to reach orgasm! But at the end of the day, some would think it comes out as rushed.
Start slowly, acting like you’re part of the Fast and Furious franchise can only cause more accidents and sometimes injuries if you’re not careful. You could scratch, poke, or even hurt your partner.
With a slow and steady speed, you can slowly build up to the desired preference your partner could have when it comes to fingering women.
It’s More Than Sticking Your Finger In And Out
Finger techniques are more than just sticking a single finger in and out like you’re diving for coins between couch cushions. How fingering works by applying light pressure and a rocking motion that creates the designated effect on your partner.
The curvature of the fingers as well as how well you glide over the pubic mound and clitoral hood, and other areas of your partner’s vagina makes it all the better, it’s still a sensual act so don’t forget that whenever you try this out!
If She Says It’s Not Good… It’s Not.
Having a good ear when it comes to pleasing your partner is a must. It shouldn’t hurt to listen to instructions and when your partner asks you hit their sweet spots when it comes to making them feel their best.
If your partner says that what you’re currently trying isn’t doing much for them, don’t take it as an insult but as criticism. Change course and listen to what they like.
If they don’t like how you finger their vagina, odds are trying it again, and persisting on how you like it, isn’t going to do much for them.
Fingering Isn’t Just For Foreplay
The thought of fingering just being initiated before things get too hot and heavy is a complete hoax. Not only will taking a break from penetration to make you last longer in the bedroom, but it could also provide another form of stimulation to your partner.
A recent study showed that some women cannot orgasm from penetration alone (source), but also require clitoral stimulation to have a climax. Lending a hand to your partner on the most sensitive part of their body will have them see fireworks.
Be A Tease
This can be tricky as there is a thin line between teasing and full-on bullying. Teasing your partner should be subtle and would have a give or two- this is the come hither movement.
What we mean by this is that even though you are teasing and letting that tension build, doesn’t mean you shouldn’t give them a little taste here and there. That would only make a woman beg for more with those little touches.
Graze your hands along the area and then focus somewhere else, only to lead back to it.
Use The Hood
The clit is a tiny nub that has a natural “hood” of skin, and that isn’t going to minimize pleasure at all in the slightest but add to your advantage. Push it back and leave the clit exposed, while gently placing your thumb on it is enough to send electricity all up your partner’s nerve endings.
Some people have described the sensation of receiving head and fingering as like sticking a q-tip in your ear- we all know how good that feels!
Layering the feeling can be like pushing the hood up, putting it back, and gently rubbing in circular motions, utilize all your options and you won’t regret the results!
Use A Toy
Some couples find it perfectly fine not to incorporate a sex toy in the bedroom- and that’s fine! But it shouldn’t be an idea kept in a box forever, sex toys should be revisited when the sex life calls for it.
There are some toys out there specifically designed for certain activities, like finger pads. Finger pads combine vibration and the feeling of your partner going in and out of will be a surefire way to make you go cross-eyed.
Use Lube
Any lube will do in this case, but preferably if you and your partner are using latex condoms, it’s probably best to stick to water-based as it can affect the condom- uh oh.
With fingering using lube can add so glide to sensitive areas as well as prevent friction build-up which can lead to vaginal irritation.
Your partner can be naturally moist, but it doesn’t hurt to add that extra lubrication to make fingering a bit more comfortable for both partners.
Go Deeper
By going deep, we don’t mean taking the plunge, slowly reaching deep inside of your partner, and slowly keeping a good rhythm all the while going as deep as your partner can feel comfortable and take it without it being too uncomfortable or painful for them.
Long thrusts are ideal if you want to hit that g spot, but if your partner says to go for it, then it’s time to listen to the captain and got full throttle for g spot stimulation.
It all relies on preference some people may prefer shallow penetration, while others may not. This deep stimulation can hit your partner’s A-spot or anterior fornix, which is an erogenous zone four to six inches inside of the vagina in front of the vaginal canal/wall.
The Final Countdown
To sum it all up, Fingering and all the pleasure that comes with it will come to your partner’s preference and how well you utilize your tools. From hands to toys, lube to anatomy, knowing what you can provide for your partner in this integral part of sex and lovemaking makes all the difference. Take it slow and listen to what your partner has to say, and we’ll be sure you’ll knock it out of the bedpost!
If you like this post and found it helpful we have loads more on our website where we not only have tricks up our sleeves but a complete guide to all things dating! From the best dating sites, to whether you should shave your balls or not, we have it all!
